Image 1 of 1
Image 1 of 1
Image 1 of 1
Image 1 of 1
"I was too much." "I wasn't enough."
Said by nearly every ADHDer I've ever met, usually in the same breath.
You know the spiral. Replaying every moment on a loop. Trying to work out where it all went wrong. The pendulum swinging between the two.
ADHD makes relationships complex. Or let's say interesting. And it leads us, and more often the people around us, to believe we're just forgetful, couldn't care less, selfish. Maybe even narcissistic.
Most of the drama in our chaotic love stories comes down to one thing. Misunderstanding.
And the research backs it up. Adults with ADHD report lower relationship satisfaction and more hostile conflict. In one study, 24 out of 25 partners of an ADHDer said the symptoms got in the way of daily life together. And parents of a child with ADHD were nearly twice as likely to have divorced by the time that child turned eight. Which means it's very likely your clients will bring a relationship into the coaching room, whether you ask them to or not.
First it was personal for me. Earlier this year I was licking my RSD wounds from a breakup and doing the full spiral. Then I listened back to a podcast I'd recorded and the guest said: "We're doing our very best with what we've got." And she was right.
Then it was my clients. The partner who doesn't get it. The parent who never did. The friendship that went quiet. Every one of them landing in a session that was booked for something else.
So, coach to coach: is couples coaching a route you might want to take? What do you need to know before a partner joins a session? How do you help a client explain their brain to the person they love without it turning into another argument? And when is it therapy, not coaching?
The process to support ourselves and our clients through this is complex, which is why this Deep Chat happens on every single coach training we do.
And there ain't no one better for the job than our very own ethics and safety lead, clinical psychologist, couples therapist and author of the bestselling book The Lasting Connection, Michaela Thomas. A woman who KNOWS, like really knows, what ADHD does inside a relationship, because she sits with couples living it every week. Direct, compassionate, and never once made me feel like a problem to be fixed. And on top of all that, she's the person who teaches our coaches where the line is.
🧡 Untangling ADHD & Relationships as an ADHD Coach, with Michaela Thomas
"I was too much." "I wasn't enough."
Said by nearly every ADHDer I've ever met, usually in the same breath.
You know the spiral. Replaying every moment on a loop. Trying to work out where it all went wrong. The pendulum swinging between the two.
ADHD makes relationships complex. Or let's say interesting. And it leads us, and more often the people around us, to believe we're just forgetful, couldn't care less, selfish. Maybe even narcissistic.
Most of the drama in our chaotic love stories comes down to one thing. Misunderstanding.
And the research backs it up. Adults with ADHD report lower relationship satisfaction and more hostile conflict. In one study, 24 out of 25 partners of an ADHDer said the symptoms got in the way of daily life together. And parents of a child with ADHD were nearly twice as likely to have divorced by the time that child turned eight. Which means it's very likely your clients will bring a relationship into the coaching room, whether you ask them to or not.
First it was personal for me. Earlier this year I was licking my RSD wounds from a breakup and doing the full spiral. Then I listened back to a podcast I'd recorded and the guest said: "We're doing our very best with what we've got." And she was right.
Then it was my clients. The partner who doesn't get it. The parent who never did. The friendship that went quiet. Every one of them landing in a session that was booked for something else.
So, coach to coach: is couples coaching a route you might want to take? What do you need to know before a partner joins a session? How do you help a client explain their brain to the person they love without it turning into another argument? And when is it therapy, not coaching?
The process to support ourselves and our clients through this is complex, which is why this Deep Chat happens on every single coach training we do.
And there ain't no one better for the job than our very own ethics and safety lead, clinical psychologist, couples therapist and author of the bestselling book The Lasting Connection, Michaela Thomas. A woman who KNOWS, like really knows, what ADHD does inside a relationship, because she sits with couples living it every week. Direct, compassionate, and never once made me feel like a problem to be fixed. And on top of all that, she's the person who teaches our coaches where the line is.
🧡 Untangling ADHD & Relationships as an ADHD Coach, with Michaela Thomas